Friday 30 April 2010

coming soon..anew blog re art and culture

Coming soon a new blog dealing with culture and art in the meantime just keep reading what comes up on this one.Eventually this blog will concentrate on politics and society.A new message wil appear soon talking about artist and shakers who dont get the attention they deserve.See you latterA

Wednesday 28 April 2010

crashing down fast

The other day i was strolling around Euston Station watching people spending money in the vast shopping complex which calls itself the terminal,good description for the future i thought.Something is not right.This is collective addiction.We are hot wired to plastic and spending like crazy just wait until the party closes its doors and we are left with nothing except our unfulfilled desires.Addiction is a killer. Before it strikes addiction allows us to participate in a delusion of displacement activities.What most people don't know about addiction is, it knows how to wait. Its a silent assassin.
We are spending in the hope that tomorrow will never arrive.Unfortunately tomorrow does arrive and in this case our whole being will be turned upside.Will we know what to do when we wont have the money to spend on goods we could afford last week but cant afford this week.Don't call on lady luck our luck is run dry.Have we really become a culture addicted to commodity?If we have then we are heading for a mental health car crash.There is no short cut out of addiction,you cant master it .Addiction takes over your whole life.Its not a minor aliment .Its life in some kind of desperate hell.
Maybe I'm being pessimistic but my take on this crises coming our way is we have misjudged the culture which this England has embraced over the years.Being hot wired into commodities we don't need is the path into addiction.The crack up might be silent,but its going to be awful and cruel,like depression addiction induces silence in the individual who is going through a very personal horror trip.We still don't have a clue in this country about the silence of deep emotional suffering people endure.
Economics is cruel ,its a rapacious beast,we have brought into the image of the beast,the party was all part if the shadow left by the beast,now people will be devoured by the monster.And the wise men and women who created this monster our smirking at our discomfort.They really have got away with something morally repugnant and we the people let them eat their cake and spit out into our faces...Lets start getting real..The road from addiction is painful and its a wake up call.."And God Sent Noah The Rainbow Sign No More Water The Fire Next Time"

Monday 26 April 2010

america x

The other morning my eyes caught sight of a large,hair brushed poster,announcing yet another arrival of a poor me American war series.American men,in these porno adventure stories always give the impression of carrying the burden of destiny on their shoulders.This is the Empire projecting its image and values into our living rooms.Here we have the lone hero in some far flung shit hole of the world defending the civilised world from the gathering storm.
What is interesting about this poster is the impact of the image and what it actually tells us about the projection of a new masculinity.
But first look at what is going on in the background.Its the tell tale weaponry portrayed to brutalising effect in Apocalypse Now.Helicopters and burning villages.We are in the territory of war is hell for the American Hero.but for the foreign other,hell is what they have coming to them
So we know the plot without having to sit through the violence.Maybe the production values will be high,this concept only enforces the the underlying cowboy story lines which ,in reality is all these war interpretations are about.
Something else is going on in this poster and that is the image of the man,a clean cut American with designer stubble and Californian Beach bum good looks is gazing at us.But what is he representing?What war is he fighting in?Because at a glance, this image is saying something interesting
Are we looking at a Roman solider on the fringes of Empire Because without doubt this air brushed image is presenting a series of mixed messages.The lone Roman legionnaire facing the corruption of an Empire and the dangers of Barbarian infiltration, was toyed with recently in the Gladiator,the ultimate historical geezer adventure,
Are we now being feed with the image of America on its mission to defend the civilised world alone.The last of the Romans in a landscape of feminine Greeks.History is a playground for Hollywood. The Westerns invented the notion of strong individualism and moral certitude.Now we may be witnessing another Western on a grander Historical scale.
The poster and its message could also imply the deep uncertainty which lies at the very heart of the American Empire.After all the Roman Empire feel apart at a time when nobody believed it could, and once it started to unravel the whole edifice proved to be a landscape ruled over by bullies and crooks.
Just an early morning thought

Saturday 24 April 2010

long night in cradle land

Its been a long night, its strange ,i know whats coming but nothing prepares the soul in coping with the loneliness and emptiness,this is what i mean when i talk about "sameness" the bleakness hangs around and another day beckons.
I should be used to this existence but that's part of the illness.Its not about being prepared its about coping,or sometimes hiding away from the happiness of other people.Its a losing battle trying to beat the beast,or as i sometimes refer to this thing "the twin" it hovers around lurking like a phantom from some long forgotten Gothic story.
Talking Gothic a little realisation came to me during my hours of staring into nothingness,if one wanted to get into the mind of our greedy masters,if you really wanted to understand the repressive psychosis of those people who view us as simpletons,read the first pages of American Psycho,one of the great American novels,a book which explores the depths of human illusions, loneliness and pure unreconstructed greed.Those people who operate in the kingdom of greed may suffer serious mental disorders yet the political and media establishment actually take on board the words of these deranged, unreconstructed, psychos, which isn't at all surprising when the truth is out.
Most of the professionals in the echo chamber of power are vain,bullying,deceitful,paranoiac unscrupulous, and vengeful.
I include Cleeg and Cameron in this list villains not just Brown...looks like a cloudy overcast day today....

last one thought

before I vanish into the sameness of the depression one last thought about the spirit of the age.Even with this illness i can still attempt to reach deep inside my dull spirits and touch the warmth of other peoples sensibility. What i cant touch or feel is an appreciation,that something truly original is taking place in the political landscape.Lets put the media to one side.Everyday we are situated with the idea of newness.Its a played out gimmick.Nothing is new.Its all a repeat of things past.The only difference being is there is more of the same ,and that same is called choice.There is no land mark experience in our politics.
Its in this idea of "sameness"wrapped as difference,that the real conflict is being played out.Change is a slogan which is vacuous,just look at Obama.A tide is not yet running through the Kingdom,its only a trickle, an invention for the moment.Our masters don't want change. The Kingdom of Greed certainly doesn't want change.We are witnessing an illusion.
A person with depression is under no illusion.Its real.Its life in the raw.
If we are true to certain basic principles of democracy,society,culture we must confront a reality.
England is no longer a world power.
There is no such fantasy as an enemy within.
Bring all our troops home now.
Ban all nuclear weapons from these shores.
And bring criminal proceeding against those greed merchants who destroyed the lives of decent people.
After thought:When some jerk of a banker rambles on about leaving this country,kick em out immediately.They aer nothing more nothing less than inefficient greedy,scumbags with the morals of a rat...See that's depression for you,it heightens the sensibilities of the mind

times dont feel like changing

Its not feeling good my twin is back in haunting mood the depression is going to have another joy ride and take me to the edge once again,I tell myself to enjoy the good periods when they arrive. Now a disjointed past keeps reappearing and the nervous system is back in attack mode.I keep trying to cling to a fleeting moment in the present,I try to hold on to a brief moment in this space before the twin kicks in and some kind of sleep rolls over the mind.It wont be a good sleep ,never is.Some kind of hell walks the twilight zone.Before I go an idea about health flashed into the mind and rekindled a dormant anger(anger is part of my depression more about this some other time),anger stimulates the brain.
I hear from politicians that they are going to cut back on waste in the public services.What is waste? Are these out of touch fantasists referring to people?Are people going to become waste.Lets get real !What is going on in the minds of economic "experts" and the weirdos who believe they have a right to rule over us.If these bully boys and girls are referring to people let them say.People will suffer, that's what Osbourn implies when he says we are all in this together.NO WE AINT.
Cameron talks about tinkering with some notion re parties electing a new leader,Cameron always comes out with a sound bite when he senses he is being left behind.Will here's one for you "Dave"Why not employ a chancellor who as done just a little bit of work in the past, not a friend born with a silver spoon in his mouth,
People will suffer,good people,honest people whilst the kingdom of greed goes on in its merry way treating honest people like dirt.
People will get angry one day, in the meantime a whole lot of people will become depressed That's the cost of waste in the waste land of political privilege.people might not take the medicine in a way the "experts "might hope.In a dark time the eye begins to see.
Depressionis hell sometimes it does open the doors of perception.Something is not rihgt in the Kingdom of sleep.

Friday 23 April 2010

Culture in a dark time

Whats going to happen to our cultural industries?Look around.Any bets on the cons introducing entrance fees!Lets face it the party of change ain't noted for its brains,excepting the one thing that's gets them going money.Nope folks they ain't changed its just our stupid Media doesn't do its job by asking the simple questions, like what would the new Cons intake really like to implement when they start hacking away at our living standards.We know they like the extreme right wing parties in Eastern Europe, that's modern approach! The kingdom is sleep walking into a very nasty future and we set on our hands and hope.Don't get fooled folks this is not about TV debates this is about our whole society and culture.The Cons and the new intake represent the GREAT LEAP BACKWARDS.We are moving into a very dark time indeed.

in a dark time at 3am

3am,that's the wake up call the time when the mind is invaded by the gloom of a self laceration and hopeless self doubt,things don't change in the early world of Cats Cradle.Two more hours before daylight and then the real,confrontation gets going.The ceiling looks unchanged,there again so does the darkness.
Whats going on in the Kingdom of mediocrity.Well looks like our frenzied Media is looking towards at Greece and panic starts to sit in.Oh dear.Come on Dave the change lets hear it from you my man Is "broken Britain"going the same way?"
Surely the party of change must have some idea on what to do,could ask such modernising minds like Eric Pikles we need more modernisers in like Pikles.Something is going on in my haed something like a nuclear war,how the hell can we listern to sush stupid drival from a party which hasent changed.Stop. Thats bullshit .The party of change has changed.Its even more dangerous than ever. Its even more crapped out then ever.The big society is a big joke more suited to the middle england version of 1950s village life than the harshb realities of life in the Kingdom of greed and mediocricity!Get real folks we are really looking into the viod of the great leap backwards!God who gave me depression? Life did sucker

in a dark time

Times dont look good in the land of catscradle.To much maddness and not enough time.May be the anger about the bankers recieving whooping bonuses is driving my depression into overdrive! I still cant get used to this damn thing.I blame the sun.

It's Wake Up Time

It's wake up time!! and the nightmare still ain't arrived on schedule.

What do I mean? Simple. This time next year all the experts, all the professionals hopefully will be looking for employment down at the job centre. OR, wondering what's happened to their minds when they start going into a deep depression. Don't worry folks, they will have enough savings to pay for expensive psychotherapy. It's about time all of us simply stop listening to the crap that these so called 'experts' spout every single day of our lives and their lives.

They didn't see. They didn't hear. And they didn't know that just on the horizon is a whopping great disaster coming our way. Who pays the piper?

Thursday 15 April 2010

Eyes down for a full house

Alphie (Alan) is coming late to the land of the blog given his topsy turvy and contradictory life. Anything is possible in the weird,upsetting and occasionally wonderful world of Alphie. Still, lets liven things up a bit.

For the past decade I have been keeping a very low profile, a kind of self-imposed prison sentence. This wasn't the best course of action because now it appears that I've written myself out of my own history. As this blog develops the reasons behind this bizarre pattern may become obvious.Then again, that might be wishful thinking. My career goes up, down, sideways, backwards, and down again with upturns into other areas I never dreamed I would enter. Age doesn't stop life and it doesn't hold back on dreams, ambitions and the permanent quest for creativity and originality. Now I'm making a comeback into the world of creativity, action and anger!!!!

Maybe that's all wrong. I should say I'm back on the outside kicking in. In many respects, I've never really been away. I've been on the fringes of weird times. Politics and culture have been reduce to cynical and hypercritical delusions. Life felt like it was one big party without end, a dream world of hedonistic illusions.

Well it looks like the party is over,and in the immortal words of millionaire Tories' "We are all in this together". Dream on baby! You don't speak for me and you don't speak for my friends and loved ones. This is going to be one hell of a hangover. Did we see the disaster coming? I think we did but the party lingered on and the sex and the highs felt right. Now it may not seem that cool. That's the problem with disasters, we expect other people to sort them out for us. Don't put your faith in other people when a massive disaster is lurking just on the horizon. We are like rats jumping off a sinking ship at the same time. It's everyone to themselves.

I've never been comfortable in the world. It's too cold, too greedy, too cruel, too full of lies and deceit. But who knows, a change of culture may be on the way. My whole life is a confrontation with something called normality.

A good part of my life (that part I remember) has been engaged with radical ideas, radical art, anything which disturbs the control of the managerial mindset of our delusional culture. We live in a society more in love with itself than at any other time in our brief history.We are an over-managed, little-minded kingdom. Now you begin to see why my career has been a wee bit difficult. Managers are nothing more than gatekeepers, but more on this another time.

I suffer from depression and spent a good part of my life in the bottle of Malt Whisky. I'm an alcoholic and the booze and the depression cost me a career in the cultural industries. Maybe a good thing, at least I kept some warped morality together and played about in academia for a while. Now that was one big mad trip! This might all sound a bit dull and a bit deep. It aint. People give me staying power. Those people close to me give me hope. These people have been about in the world. They still fight the struggle and still have radical sentiments. They are good people.

My profile changes, just like life. I love radical challenges. I love humour. Life? That's a problem. This is a journey without conclusion. I will experiment with the idea of seeing the world through the eyes of someone with depression and a life story to tell. Get set for a helter skelter ride to the edge and over the hedge. I still hold on to hope, that's the clue. In A Dark Time The Eye Begins To See. All aboard the night train... Alphie